When I decided to begin blogging I wanted to create a place where I could write about quilt making and creativity in a way that shared pieces of my life and the stories behind my quilts. The idea was to establish a place where the content was both valuable and authentic. I am passionate about authenticity! Sharing my creative life in a way that is relatable and transparent is important to me. Sometimes a pretty picture alone gives us a false sense of reality, and by blogging I felt I had a way to balance the scales and share my honest thoughts alongside my creations. I had a plan, and then in the midst of this past season I began to doubt that plan! I became overwhelmed and I struggled to feel connected to my creativity.
This past Winter was hard for me – in fact, I would go as far as to say that it has been one of the more difficult seasons of my life! Because life has been quite stressful I had to think long and hard about whether it was appropriate to share some of what I have recently experienced here. I have been torn between the authenticity I crave and the desire to focus only on the positive.
This blog is my personal creative journal and I realised that sharing this part of my story was important, if for no other reason than to remind myself that hope is healing, change is inevitable and there is always something new to learn. Honouring my heart and my instincts is part of who I strive to be, and my heart says that sometimes by sharing the negative you can more fully appreciate the positive.
More than ever I know this to be true –
Creativity is a combination of energy, habit and heart.
At the essence of my stress was fatigue. I had no energy!!
I wasn’t just tired, I was completely exhausted and rather unexpectedly found myself in the care of a specialist physician, trying to find the mysterious cause and a solution.
Did you know that your brain accounts for approximately 20% of your energy consumption when you are at rest? We all know how amazing the human brain is but have you ever stopped to think about how much energy is consumed in order to think creatively? The bottom line is that when you are running low on energy your brain doesn’t have the capacity to perform complex tasks – your energy levels do make a difference to your creative output!
Originally I was forcing myself to work through my energy lulls, which usually resulted in more mistakes than I would generally make, and me asleep on the sofa by mid afternoon. After being forced to take a break from all creative endeavours to care for our family dog Daisy when she became ill, I realised how big a disservice I was doing myself by trying to push through my periods of low energy in order to keep my creative habit intact. Habits are vital to creativity but that is only the case relative to your energy levels on any given day. You need to have enough energy for all the things in your life that are important, so sometimes you have to pace yourself and prioritise what you are willing to give your energy to.
I had to make new decisions about how I spent my time and solve my energy concerns. I had to create empty space in my life in order to make room for the possibility of creativity in the future. I needed to recharge my batteries so that creating was rewarding and fulfilling, not draining. I had to let go of all the emotional baggage that was weighing me down and begin the task of healing emotionally and physically if I wanted my energy levels to be restored.
Athletes know the importance of managing their energy levels consciously in order to be at their physical best. They apply specific strategies and routines in order to maintain their health and wellbeing. Their off-season is just as important as their actual performance time. They know the power of rest and recovery in order to refuel their energy reserves.
As creative makers it is just as important for us to be aware of our creative wellbeing and have a plan for rest and recovery after we engage in projects that require intense bursts of energy. Whether being creative is your job or a large part of your personal life it is important to protect yourself from possible burnout.
This season has taught me that you don’t need to be a university professor to understand the benefits of a routine sabbatical. In order to focus on the things that mattered to me and to restore my health I ‘unplugged’ from the world for the month of September. I admit that this wasn’t a planned action, but in hindsight I can see how much I needed to disconnect from the distraction of social media, the comparison trap and ‘inspiration overload’, and have the opportunity to think deeply and rekindle my own creative passion.
All these things together have led me to understand the value in a routine mini sabbatical – perhaps a week off every seventh week to really focus on restoring those dwindling energy levels!
While I am still working on ways I can improve my health I now more fully appreciate the role energy plays in my personal creativity. Up until these recent events it is not something I had ever really considered, BUT IT IS SO IMPORTANT! This whole experience has changed the way I structure my creative time and the type of projects I am choosing to work on – and yes, it has renewed my enthusiasm for creating in unexpected ways. Awareness is so important!
Whether you are currently tired, run-down, or have a clinically diagnosed case of fatigue I hope you take a moment to think about how energy plays a role in your creativity and take the time you need to recharge.
As for me I now have a new version of my plan – one that is more suited to fluctuating energy levels, and one that allows me to feel connected to my work again.
It’s a good plan ;).
I would love to hear your thoughts!
Samantha
I think the idea of a sabbatical is a good one! I took the first three months of this year off IG, and really found it helpful and relaxing and reenergising! Thanks for sharing! Lovely photos by the way. Best wishes to you, Samantha xx
I hadn’t realised it was 3 month Michelle! But I do remember thinking once you started posting on IG again that you seemed energised – which I guess is the point to taking the break in the first place.
Such thoughtful words, Samantha.
About seven years ago I found it was becoming harder and harder to even walk into my sewing room. The things that had once brought me so much joy…quilting and blogging…had become a chore. I literally abandoned that part of my life for six full years, replacing it with more important things at the time. Things that focused more on my family. It wasn’t until a year ago, when I was asked to make a quilt for the Utah Orem Mission home, that I found that joy again. Still, I find myself going through temporary lulls. I’ve noticed that if I take a step back for a week or two, I’m recharged and eager to get going again.
Thanks for sharing your heart and wisdom with us.
Thanks Kairle! It is amazing how even a short break can make such a big difference to our enthusiasm and joy. I’m glad you are sewing again and finding that perfect balance for you and your family. I certainly appreciate having such a big break from the craft since I privately refer to this part of my quilting life as the 2.0 version. I used to quilt quite a bit in the late 90’s, but then I had to put it aside to focus on my career and family. It wasn’t until 2013 that I started quilting again after a series of serendipitous events that has led me here today. (And how fun that you were asked to make a quilt for the mission home!)
Samantha, thanks so much for sharing this! I can relate a lot, yet I’m sorry you were going through such a hard time. I call those hard times “funks” and go through them every now and then. After Spring Market this year I went through one of my biggest ones and took my biggest break from sewing. I totally lost my desire. I think it’s back now but I think I must have been exhausted! I think I needed to find some balance in my life, as well. Focusing on some other aspects of my life that I had been wanting to do (but neglecting to do) like house projects, exercise, church stuff, etc. helped me to find balance. And, enjoying those other interests for a while (and giving myself permission to take a break from sewing) helped to take the pressure off to find my creativity and it eventually came back on its own. Sorry about my long comment but I just wanted to say thanks for sharing these thoughts. They helped me and I need to pay more attention to caring for myself physically and mentally so the creativity can stay up!
Take care! You’re amazing and your IG is truly beautiful and inspiring!
Hugs, Amber
Gigi’s Thimble
Thanks Amber! I find myself nodding to every word you said – I completely agree! Finding the right balance can be so tricky, especially when you work from home. Trying to find a way to meet all my home and church responsibilities while also trying to establish a small business can be a lot for one person both physically and emotionally – I think it is definitely important to give yourself that permission to just ‘close the door’ occasionally!
My story is much like the one above- I’ve had to take a step back recently- because we decided to add one last baby to our family, move twice, and start a new job! It’s put my life upside down! My heart longs to sew again, but by now it’s been so long and I still can’t seem to find the time I need to just get to the day to day tasks, I’ve just decided to be ok with where I am right now. I realize there is a time and season for everything and sometimes we just need to evaluate our lives to determine what are the most important priorities at the time.
I appreciate this post so much! So honest and open. I’m glad you’ve been able to sort through the challenge and feel better about where you’re at. I am inspired by you!
Thank you Rach!You have been so busy lately and this is such a special time for you and your little one that I’m sure the time away from your sewing machine is going to fill you with all sorts of inspiration when you eventually have more time for yourself. It is so important to recognise the blessings that come from where we are in each moment of our lives – this is something that I am trying to work on remembering right now, because even though I know it to be true in my heart it is still easy to fall into the comparison trap and wish I could be doing more, or that I was enjoying a different phase of my life. I think this is why it has been so helpful to me to take a step back from social media and just clear my mind and focus more on my own priorities.
Good for you…it took a lot of courage to write that blog post! Have you ever heard of the Spoon Theory? https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/ I have found it so helpful to remind myself how to care for myself, but also for “regular” people to read. They understand my life so much better after reading it. Your work is beautiful and so many of us appreciate it. Take care.
Hi Kimberly – Thanks for sharing that article! I didn’t go into too much detail about the underlying cause of my fatigue in my post because it is difficult to fully explain (and I imagine not very interesting to most people), but I have had one chronic illness or another most of life due to a number of issues that stem from having an auto-immune arthritis. I have been aware of the Spoonie principle and yet I have never actually read that article before -so thank you for sharing!
Like everyone else, I really appreciate your thoughts. I love the idea of one week off every seven. I certainly fall into the comparison trap at times. I recently felt like I had fallen out of love with quilting. My job took more time & I was on social media less. That turned out to be a good thing for me. Balance is so important. Thank you again for sharing your experience!
You are so welcome Jeanne! I think the key is to remember how balance is different for everyone. I have to remind myself that I need to concentrate on what works for me and stop trying to be someone else.Being aware of how my energy levels play a big part in every decision I make throughout the day has made such a difference to my outlook and joy. I hope your love for this craft returns to you in full soon 🙂
I loved this so much that I had to read it two or three times to let it all sink in. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. You are one incredible lady!!!
Thanks Jen – I think you are pretty amazing too!
Thanks you for posting this. I have been following you on IG & just recently started reading your blog (love both! Thank you!). I struggle daily with severely low energy levels & it does feel like no one understands how utterly exhausted you are All. Of. The. Time. I have always been obsessed by what time it is now & how much time I have until I have to get dinner ready, how much time will laundry take, when should I get to bed, etc. Now I know it is because I was really trying to figure out how much I could complete based on how much energy I had & do I need 6, 7, 8 or more hours of sleep? (On weekends I sleep about 9 hours a night!) Socializing is just too draining for me, it really is so I love IG but do not get anything creative or quilty done b/c I am imtimidated by what everyone else is doing. I need a break from it all & to focus on what brings me energy. Thank you!!! Your patterns & quilts are gorgeous!!
Thank you for sharing your story Diana! The struggle is definitely real and fatigue is something that is greatly misunderstood. Understanding and being consciously aware of how my body requires energy to participate in different tasks has really helped me plan for my day and find a balance that works for me. I hope you find some joy in creating again soon and don’t compare yourself to what you see on IG – we all have something unique to contribute and our creative journey is shaped by who we are and our own unique circumstances.